War or Kindness?
I was working with a client the other day and when she began sharing how much her life had changed as a result of our work together I found myself minimizing my part in it. It is my belief that I don't heal anyone. I DO, however, facilitate setting up all aspects of your BodyMindSpirit to be balanced in a way that healing can happen on all levels.
She kept insisting I take credit. As I thought about this later I had a realization. I was afraid that by taking credit that I would be disempowering her right and ability to heal herself. As I dug deeper, I then realized that by NOT allowing myself to be recognized and honored in that situation I was actually disempowering myself and dishonoring the gifts that I bring to facilitate deep healing and changes in the lives of the people I serve. Hmmmm…
Bear with me just a little bit more, please. My curiosity got me to explore further and what emerged was that there was a deeper belief that led me to realize I was afraid. Afraid that if I did take credit in any way that others would expect me to be responsible for their healing and wholeness. And if miracles did not happen for them then they would blame me.
I know this all sounds crazy. And, truthfully, it is crazy making. But I do have a point here. Any time that crazy making is happening in a way that manifests as fear, or judgment is the same as making war with yourself. Kindness towards yourself, instead is about owning your gifts and value and self respect. It's about being willing to be seen and heard and allowing others to be responsible for themselves by being responsible for yourself.
Do you spend the day being at war with yourself or being kind to yourself?
Please let me know by commenting below. I'd really like to hear.
You and Your Choices Matter. And You Have Value! And being kind to, instead of at war with yourself, allows you to show up and be fully In Touch In Life.
Tags: empowering, fear, healing, self respect, self value
Thought provoking post and apropos for me today since I have been said that I am too hard on myself. I haven't thought of it as being hard but rather as seeing the "truth" of a situation. Thanks I'll be thinking about this also as I ponder the whole arena of being kind to myself.
Thank you Teresa for your leadership in bringing forth attention to the often forgotten area of self-love. Until recently, I was someone who invested time and energy into bottomless relationships. I did this at the expense of my self-dignity and self-respect. Why? That cycle only made me feel unfulfilled and often very angry. Only, recently did I realize that I was longing for solicitous interplay but instead walking into unforeseen crevasses. All that time I had spent on relationships that put me on unequal footing. How was I allowing this? This past week however, I decided to consciously to be "kind" to myself. Instead of running to the people who mistreated me in the past, I walked away. It was almost as though I was watching myself from a whole new dimension. Why had it been so hard to do that in the past? What was missing then I discovered was the courage to write myself a prescription for nurturing and care. Identifying the desire for longing helped me recognize that what I needed was to evolve from a state of longing to a belief in the existence in the actual experience.